My friend was broken up with over the weekend, they had been
a close friend-couple that we hung out with and I thoroughly enjoyed them. They met around the same time as my Daniel
and I and we’ve been on this same adventure together, I suppose you could
say. I’d seen how their relationship
started, how in love he was with her (much like myself with mine) in the
beginning. I honestly don’t know what
happened but I feel the struggle she’s going through. It pulls on my heart because I know. Not to say I’ve been in her exact situation
but to not be loved back by someone, is something I have experienced and never
want to again. I hope she is okay, I hope
she can pull through and maybe someday get some answers. She deserves that.
I’m not completely sure why it’s hitting home so hard for me. I teared up this morning thinking of her,
crying alone at home just wanting him to be there and be okay. I’m guessing it’s because I’ve experienced
the darkness, the feeling of no hope and just wanting the pain to go away but
knowing there’s no light for a long time.
It’s a familiar feeling. But more than that, it reminds me how much
heartbreak can fuck you up. To be
honest, it scares the shit out of me to remember those emotions, because I
forgot how absolutely horrible and terrifying they can be. I’m not necessarily worried that I will go
through that again anytime soon, but remembering that it’s possible, when I’m
this far in, when I’m this in love. I don’t
know if “pulling through” would be that possible for me.
I’m trying to shake my head of the thought, there’s nothing I
can do but hope my friend will be okay. And
hope that she can have hope.
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